I've received an email detailing anothers struggle against a sociopath that is consuming the lives of thier parents. I sympathize with their attempts at legal intervention because my own were fruitless. My impression of the legal authorities is they assume both parties are lying for their own ends. And, in the authorities defense, it does appear that most people believe that lying is acceptable if it can be gotten away with. If the authorities do not have overwhelming evidence they do not appear to rule in anyones favor and choose to do nothing.
Here's another aspect to consider. If you read Martha Stout's book you could conclude that many business people, politicians, police, lawyers and maybe judges are possibly sociopaths. Now I'm not a big advocate of conspiracy theories but given the types of occupations sociopaths gravitate towards it's almost looking like they could be running the show, to a large extent. This being the case, it would not be in their best interest to seek legal precidents against anyone that could be a sociopath. Please remember this is just a thought of mine and is certainly not based on any research.
Now, getting back to the question of whether there is any way to battle a sociopath that is manipulating parents or anyone else, whether it be parents, other relatives or friends, you have to let the others come to their own conclusions. Sociopaths are just too good at lying and making others believe them. Many times people have to loose most of what they have or be abused to a great extent before they come to their own conclusion and say enough is enough! Trying to convince someone that a sociopath is manipulating them is like banging our head against the proverbial wall. People that are being manipulated have difficulty conceiving how someone could have no conscience. You can explain it as much as you want but without a reference frame to what sociopaths are capable of they can't understand it until it's already happened to them. Then they may still be in denial.
3 comments:
"Here's another aspect to consider. If you read Martha Stout's book you could conclude that many business people, politicians, police, lawyers and maybe judges are possibly sociopaths. Now I'm not a big advocate of conspiracy theories but given the types of occupations sociopaths gravitate towards it's almost looking like they could be running the show, to a large extent. This being the case, it would not be in their best interest to seek legal precidents against anyone that could be a sociopath."
I couldn't agree more as I've come to this conclusion myself. The good thing is that there are some very empathetic people in these fields (particularly judges) that I believe can spot disordered individuals right away based on their experiences on the bench. These are the best judges, in my opinion. Unfortunately, we don't get to choose judges presiding over our cases.
Thank you for sharing your story. It makes me feel a little bit better that I am not alone. My ex-husband, my son's father, is a sociopath. Even though we are divorced, he is rotten to the core to me. Why, I ask myself is he this way. He is the one that had an affair and broke the marriage up. Not me. He's a nasty human being to the core. He is scary and has an explosive temper, violent that he is in denial about. He has subjected our son with his violent episodes while our son was visiting with him. My son comes home traumatized and completely shaken. Then if I confront his dad about it, he says our son is exaggerating. I remember his violent episodes from when I was married to him, so I know my son is telling the truth. This guy is wearing me down. My son refused to speak or see his dad for 5 months because of the last violent episode he witnessed while visiting with his dad. Do you think his dad would take responsibility for his anger problem and get help from a counselor or doctor? No... instead he takes me to court for contempt of custody charge because he says I should "force" our son to see him. I am very proud of my son for taking a stand and refusing to see his dad, since he was so abused by him on the last visit. I will not force my son, who is now 13 yrs old to visit with his dad. I have our son in counseling and he told the counselor that he is terrified of his dad. So he takes me to court for contempt, his written complaint about me is full of lies. I had to hire a lawyer to defend me. My son's dad was furious that I got a lawyer. What does he expect me to do? He filed a contempt charge against me. My lawyer got the contempt charge dropped and drew up an amended custody order that protects my son. I am so relieved my son is now protected and the order states that if my son has anxiety or is upset about his dad's behavior then he does not have to go for his visit with him, etc. but this cost me $1,500 to my lawyer... I wish every day that he would change, but he only gets worse. He is never to be trusted, not ever. Sorry, just needed to vent all this. I would appreciate any feedback on how to deal with a sociopath. Thank you,
Elaina
My brother in law shows sociopathic tendencies, and his behavior over the years has led to my decision to have no contact with him (self preservation). His 6 year old daughter is very attached to me, and even though she hasn't seen or spoken to me in a year she still asks her grandmother regularly if she can come see me. The big problem is that last year we cut off all contact because of his admittedly false accusations of being molested by his mother as a child. I believe that seeing the child will open my husband and I to bigger risk, and we have a lot to lose. Any ideas on how to make this easier on the child? How do you explain that you can't see her because her Daddy hates you?
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